मन्थरा त्वभ्यसूयैनामुत्सृज्याभरणं च तत्।
उवाचेदं ततो वाक्यं कोपदुःखसमन्विता॥
mantharā tv abhyasūyainām utsṛjyābharaṇaṁ ca tat
uvācedaṁ tato vākyaṁ kopa-duḥkha-samanvitā
mantharā = Mantharā; tu = but; abhyasūya = displeased; enām = with Kaikeyī; utsṛjya = threw away; ābharaṇam = ornament; ca = and; tat = that; uvāca = spoke; idam = the following; tataḥ = then; vākyam = words; kopa-duḥkha-samanvitā = with anger and distress.
But Mantharā, displeased with Kaikeyī, threw away that ornament and then, with anger and distress, spoke the following words.
1 The point is that one should not engage in these six activities with nondevotees. These six activities are expressions of love and affection, and a devotee of the Supreme Lord should refrain from them in relation to those who are not devotees of the Supreme Lord. That does not mean that one should hate non-Vaiṣṇavas, for hatred has no place in the life of a spiritually progressive Vaiṣṇava. Rather, one should be compassionate upon innocent nondevotees and try to rectify them of their misconceptions, and neglect stubborn nondevotees who do not want their misconceptions to be removed. See Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam 11.2.46 and the ācāryas’ comments on it for more details.
1 This incident of Kaikeyī’s spiritual and moral falldown because of her affectionate relationship with Mantharā is a lesson for all of us.
The sage Vālmīki clarifies that by the influence of the association of an evil-minded person, even great souls can become disturbed in mind.
Mantharā was angry that Kaikeyī was not listening to her good advice and distressed that a disaster would take place.
NOTE. Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (5.18.12) emphatically declares that those who are not interested in pure devotional service to the Supreme Lord cannot have good qualities:
yasyāsti bhaktir bhagavaty akiñcanā
sarvair guṇais tatra samāsate surāḥ
harāv abhaktasya kuto mahad-guṇā
manorathenāsati dhāvato bahiḥ
“All the demigods and their exalted qualities, such as religion, knowledge and renunciation, become manifest in the body of one who has developed unalloyed devotion for the Supreme Personality of Godhead, Vāsudeva. On the other hand, a person devoid of devotional service and engaged in material activities has no good qualities. Even if he is adept at the practice of mystic yoga or the honest endeavor of maintaining his family and relatives, he must be driven by his own mental speculations and must engage in the service of the Lord’s external energy. How can there be any good qualities in such a man?”
Therefore, associating with dedicated nondevotees is forbidden by Lord Caitanya Mahāprabhu. In this regard, Śrīla Prabhupāda notes in his purport to Caitanya-caritāmṛta Madhya 22.87:
Saṅgāt sañjāyate kāmaḥ (Bg. 2.62). One develops his consciousness according to society and association... [A] devotee should be very careful when associating with those who are not devotees. When asked by a householder devotee what the behavior of a devotee should be, Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu immediately replied:
asat-saṅga-tyāga,—ei vaiṣṇava-ācāra
‘strī-saṅgī’—eka asādhu, ’kṛṣṇābhakta’ āra
(Cc. Madhya 22.87)
A Vaiṣṇava, a devotee, should simply discard intimate association with nondevotees. In his Upadeśāmṛta (4), Śrīla Rūpa Gosvāmī has described the symptoms of intimate relationships in this way:
dadāti pratigṛhṇāti guhyam ākhyāti pṛcchati
bhuṅkte bhojayate caiva ṣaḍ-vidhaṁ prīti-lakṣaṇam
The above-mentioned six symptoms of intimate relationships are:
Offering gifts in charity, accepting charitable gifts, revealing one’s mind in confidence, inquiring confidentially, accepting prasāda and offering prasāda are the six symptoms of love shared by one devotee and another.1
Kaikeyī’s great blunder was that she associated with Mantharā lovingly as noted above. She should have had Mantharā stop then and there, apologize and withdraw from her presence.
Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (10.74.40) clearly states that those who hear offenses to the Lord or His beloved devotees should be given up:
nindāṁ bhagavataḥ śṛṇvaṁs tat-parasya janasya vā
tato nāpaiti yaḥ so ’pi yāty adhaḥ sukṛtāc cyutaḥ
“Anyone who fails to immediately leave the place where he hears criticism of the Supreme Lord or His faithful devotee will certainly fall down, bereft of his pious credit.”2
1. The point is that one should not engage in these six activities with nondevotees. These six activities are expressions of love and affection, and a devotee of the Supreme Lord should refrain from them in relation to those who are not devotees of the Supreme Lord. That does not mean that one should hate non-Vaiṣṇavas, for hatred has no place in the life of a spiritually progressive Vaiṣṇava. Rather, one should be compassionate upon innocent nondevotees and try to rectify them of their misconceptions, and neglect stubborn nondevotees who do not want their misconceptions to be removed. See Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam 11.2.46 and the ācāryas’ comments on it for more details.
2. This incident of Kaikeyī’s spiritual and moral falldown because of her affectionate relationship with Mantharā is a lesson for all of us.