Canto 2 -
Ayodhyā-kāṇḍa
Chapter 27: Sītā Requests Rāma to Take Her to the Forest
Text 2.27.1
एवमुक्ता तु वैदेही प्रियार्हा प्रियवादिनी।
प्रणयादेव सङ्क्रुद्धा भर्तारमिदमब्रवीत्॥
evam uktā tu vaidehī priyārhā priya-vādinī
praṇayād eva saṅkruddhā bhartāram idam abravīt
evam = thus; uktā = when Rāma spoke to her; tu = but; vaidehī = Vaidehī; priya-arhā = who deserved to be spoken to pleasantly; priya-vādinī = and moreover who spoke pleasantly; praṇayāt = out of affection; eva = but only; saṅkruddhā = became very angry; bhartāram = her husband; idam = the following; abravīt = and told.
But when Rāma spoke to her thus, Vaidehī, who deserved to be spoken to pleasantly and who spoke pleasantly, became very angry, but only out of affection, and told her husband the following.
So far, the sage Vālmīki has pointed out the ordinary duties to be executed by all—as it will be executed by Rāma among the men in Rāmāyaṇa.1 Now he briefly alludes to the duty of a woman—to accept her duties of chastity—as will be carried out by Sītā.2
Even a woman who does not speak pleasantly deserves to be spoken to pleasantly [by her husband]. On top of that, Sītā was used to speaking pleasantly. Still, Rāma had spoken to her thus, that is, displeasingly. She was angry with her husband only out of affection, that is, good wishes, not out of hostility [towards her husband].
NOTE. The common duties for all are enlisted in Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam 7.11.8-12. A smaller list appears in the Bhāgavatam (11.17.21) thus:
ahiṁsā satyam asteyam akāma-krodha-lobhatā
bhūta-priya-hitehā ca dharmo ’yaṁ sārva-varṇikaḥ
“Nonviolence, truthfulness, honesty, desire for the happiness and welfare of all others and freedom from lust, anger and greed constitute duties for all the four varṇas.”
The woman’s duties of chastity are brought out in the Bhāgavatam (7.11.25-28) thus:
strīṇāṁ ca pati-devānāṁ tac-chuśrūṣānukūlatā
tad-bandhuṣv anuvṛttiś ca nityaṁ tad-vrata-dhāraṇam
“To render service to the husband, to be always favorably disposed toward the husband, to be equally well disposed toward the husband’s relatives and friends, and to follow the vows of the husband—these are the four principles to be followed by women described as chaste.”
sammārjanopalepābhyāṁ gṛha-maṇḍana-vartanaiḥ
svayaṁ ca maṇḍitā nityaṁ parimṛṣṭa-paricchadā
kāmair uccāvacaiḥ sādhvī praśrayeṇa damena ca
vākyaiḥ satyaiḥ priyaiḥ premṇā kāle kāle bhajet patim
“A chaste woman must dress nicely and decorate herself with golden ornaments for the pleasure of her husband. Always wearing clean and attractive garments, she should sweep and clean the household with water and other liquids so that the entire house is always pure and clean. She should collect the household paraphernalia and keep the house always aromatic with incense and flowers and must be ready to execute the desires of her husband. Being modest and truthful, controlling her senses, and speaking in sweet words, a chaste woman should engage in the service of her husband with love, according to time and circumstances.”
santuṣṭālolupā dakṣā dharma-jñā priya-satya-vāk
apramattā śuciḥ snigdhā patiṁ tv apatitaṁ bhajet
“A chaste woman should not be greedy, but satisfied in all circumstances. She must be very expert in handling household affairs and should be fully conversant with religious principles. She should speak pleasingly and truthfully and should be very careful and always clean and pure. Thus a chaste woman should engage with affection in the service of a husband who is not fallen.”
The great sage Śrī Vālmīki will abundantly point out how the Lord and His beloved consort demonstrated all of their respective duties in a manner unimaginable by any jīvātmā.