Canto 2 -
Ayodhyā-kāṇḍa
Chapter 12: Kaikeyī Reaffirms her Demands
Text 2.12.12
परा भवति मे प्रीतिर्दृष्ट्वा तनयमग्रजम्।
अपश्यतस्तु मे रामं नष्टा भवति चेतना॥
parā bhavati me prītir dṛṣṭvā tanayam agrajam
apaśyatas tu me rāmaṁ naṣṭā bhavati cetanā
parā = most; bhavati me = I become; prītiḥ = pleased; dṛṣṭvā = when I see; tanayam = son; agrajam = my eldest; apaśyataḥ = upon not seeing; tu = but; me = I; rāmam = Rāma; naṣṭā bhavati = lose; cetanā = my consciousness.
When I see my eldest son, I become most pleased. But upon not seeing Rāma, I lose my consciousness.
1 Here “consciousness” means “memory of what he is supposed to do at that time.”
NOTE. In some manuscripts, naṣṭaṁ bhavati cetanam appears instead of naṣṭā bhavati cetanā. [The meaning is practically the same.]
GLOSS. Cetanam indicates that [upon not seeing Rāma, Daśaratha loses] his memory [of what he should be doing at that time].1